The Amazing Vegetable Flesh Former…

But first…
Dulltown, Europe: Today’s architectural term is ‘xystus’ – In Greek architecture, a long portico used for athletic contests.
I had a nice long xystus, but I didn’t use it much, and had it removed.

A week or two ago I showed you an advertising page (Joan the Wad, lucky Cornish piskey) from the middle pages of one of those 1960s British science fiction paperbacks that I mention occasionally in these posts; those marvelously bad ‘Badger Books’ with the lovely covers.
They always had two full-page adverts slipped into the middle of their stories; here is the other one:

badger ads
I don’t think I need to comment much on this piece of outrageous chicanery, except to admire the drawing style, and perhaps suggest that, ‘Beautipon’ the breast enhancement cream (adds healthy flesh), ‘Beautipon Vitamin Tablets’ (nourishing revitalising haemoglobia flesh-forming malt, and pure yeast) ‘Slimcream’ the breast reduction cream, (reduces fat anywhere), and the marvelous hair restoring ‘Nature Treatment’, are all the same stuff, but in different jars; it was probably just some very cheap hand cream, perchased in five gallon tubs and repackaged in someone’s garage or garden shed…
Oh look, it might also ‘activate the growth glands’ and make one taller too… ‘permanent gain of 1 to 5 inches – containing the Sunshine Vitamin’… Mind you, the six shillings and sixpence ‘Stop Smoking’ course I sent for really did help me – I was on two packs of Sobranie Black Russians per day and I completely stopped in less than a week. (D.W. of Dulltown UK.)
Black Russians

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in advertising, archeology, architecture, brain, history, humour, information, irony, money, reading, smoking, surrealism, words, writing and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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