Stella and troublesome footwear…

But first…
Dulltown, Europe: Today’s rat is the one with the latte and the laptop in the Canary Wharf cafe.

DSCN1661The Audience No. 2. (1992) Charcoal and pencil on paper, about 24″ x 18″.

‘Hello Stella, do come in… Whoa! What very bright shoes!…’
‘They’re not shoes David, they’re Doc Marten boots…’
‘Oh, so they are… You look a bit perturbed my dear, what’s up?’
‘They’re new and they nip like buggers!’
“Like buggers’ Stella?’
‘Shut up you oaf… let me take them off for a few minutes…’
‘I think you might need tea and biscuits my dear.’
‘Get on with it then… What’s this? ‘Landscape No. 5,000′?’
‘No, my dear, it’s called…’
‘What kind of biscuits have you got? Something decent I hope?’
“Nice biscuits’…’
‘Did you deliberately go out of your way to find the most boring…’
‘Stella, just calm down, and… whoo!… spotted pink socks – they do go well with the colour of your bright Docs though… they are so bright. I don’t think I’ve ever seen such…’
‘It looks like another of your so-called ‘landscape drawings’ David… Yet more dark relentlessly moiling turbidity…’
‘Eh?… Here’s your tea – try a ‘nice’ with it – they are good for dunking you know…’
‘Do I?… Hm… I can see what this is all about – yes, I see them all, in their cages – staring blankly, but ecstatically, at the sparkling gewgaws…’
‘The ‘sparkling gewgaws’ Stella?…’
‘The enveloping great filthy harsh metropolis, the decay, the rust stained concrete detritus – like lab rats in their pens, they soak up the capitalist mindless television mush-fodder – the heartless media instilling in the poor ignorant slugs feelings of meanness, envy, smugness, acquisitiveness, greed and…’
“Mush-fodder’? – How are you getting on with the ‘nice’ then Stella?’
‘They’re alright I suppose – what about some dark chocolate digestives next time David?’
‘You could always buy a packet, and bring them with you you know… I like the way you wiggle your toes when you get excited…’
‘Ha!… I see why you have them facing each other.’
‘The biscuits?’
‘No, the lab rats – it’s to encourage tribalism – just like the opiate of the masses, football – them and us! – competition!… distraction from the real issues of the…’
‘Is the Yorkshire Tea to your liking Stella?’
‘Yes, it’s very nice…’
‘Would you like a bowl of hot soapy water to put your feet in?’
‘Hm… yes, alright…’


About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in advertising, art, brain, colours, conversation, drawing, existentialism, Grumpiness, humour, information, style, surrealism, TV, words and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to Stella and troublesome footwear…

  1. Pingback: Charcoal drawing on paper. 1992 |

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