Small, but pithy items…

But first…
Dulltown, Europe: Today’s instruction is to tiptoe up to it, stroke its snout, and, whilst humming Paul McCartney’s ‘Mull of Kintyre’, feed it handfuls of broken biscuits.

Excuses for being late. No. 217.
I’m sorry I’m late, but I needed to polish my maracas.

An item of spam from ‘weight training lifestyles’ appeared in my comments box yesterday:
‘Wow, superb blog format! How lengthy have you been blogging for? you make blogging look easy.
Thank you ‘weight training lifestyles’ – I shall bear what in mind you have said.

An observation:
‘All the people in town today had mouse faces.’
‘Wearing masks?…’
‘No, they had mouse faces.’

A single overheard remark:
‘It’s a chicken and egg spoon…’

Sitting in front of me on the bus the other day was a fluffy-haired youth wearing a black leather biker jacket and an Hawaiian shirt. I watched him on his smart phone looking through pictures of ancient ornate swords for sale. I imagine that he couldn’t quite decide whether to go for the ‘Mighty Blade of Thangaha’, or ‘Elf-Slayer Mystico of Gongi the Magnificent’.

A single overheard remark:
‘What? The performing clerics?…’

No, I’m sorry, I don’t want to go in this cafe – it seems to be full of alpha males in expensive grey suits and ties braying at each other.

‘All you artists and writers are just the court jesters for the kings of capitalism!…’
(Professor Mouldie)

Another item of spam in my comments box. This one from ‘codex’:
‘all the time I used to read smaller articles which also clear their motive, and that is also happening with this paragraph I am reading at this place.’
Thank you ‘codex’ – I will bear in mind what you have said.

The bus driver on the No. 15A yesterday was loudly whistling ‘When the Red Red Robin Comes Bob Bob Bobbing Along’ alternatively with snatches of John Denver’s ‘Take me Home, Country Roads’. It was very nice!



About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in advertising, brain, conversation, cool, existentialism, Hull.UK., humour, information, music, observations, people, serendipity, style, surrealism and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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