A few shortish items…

But first…
Dullown, Europe: Today’s Elizabethan expletive is ‘Thou whoreson knave!’
Why not give this one an airing the next time a scruffy youth on a bicycle whizzes past you on the pavement?

Excuses for being late. No. 232.
I’m sorry I’m late, but my Morse code class ran on a bit.

A single overheard remark:
‘I could just shave it of course…’

So, which kind of dentist do you prefer? In my experience there are two kinds: the loud, jolly, rugby-playing, ‘Now what’s the matter! Don’t be such a baby!’ type, and the quiet, slightly creepy, ham-fisted one who does imitation smiles and attempts theatrical cheerfulness…

Oh, what’s this? It’s an item of spam in my comments box. It seems to be from someone called Nike Max.
‘Dan elle was quite possibly prepared to fork out her full provide of the full employment taxes. Might be locate that your existing abilities and staff match a exceptional consumer than anyone might have additionally pursued.’
Well, thank you Max, it’s good to hear from you, I shall certainly bear in mind what you have said.

I’m thinking of changing my name to Lou Sleef-Tea.

I see that there’s a film on the TV tonight starring Bruce Willis, it’s called Mercury Rising. I wonder, will be about a planet coming over the horizon, the science of thermometry, or the great god Hermes getting out of bed, putting his socks on, and cleaning his teeth?… (M)

Oh, don’t mind Bob – his job involves a lot of shouting, he’s always like this in public places…

A single overheard remark:
‘Nothing is brown!…’

That’s funny! Every time I glance at someone today, they immediately trip up and stumble. Of all the ‘special powers’ I could have developed, this is a really useless one!…Should I bother taking on the name ‘Stumble-Man’?



About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in brain, conversation, cool, dreaming, Dulltown, existentialism, expletives, Hull.UK., humour, information, irony, mind, observations, seeing, serendipity, surrealism, TV, words and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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