Some small, but pithy items…

But first…
Dulltown, Europe: Today’s random dictionary words are: bloncket, oleaster, telestich, inficete, and vambrace. Please have these words looked up and placed in suitable sentences ready for Professor Mouldie first thing after breakfast tomorrow morning. Should the Professor turn up dressed as a cowboy, smoking a cheroot, and spitting freely into the waste paper basket, you must not draw attention to, or remark on this.

Excuses for being late. No. 254.
I’m sorry I’m late, but I found a scorpion in one of my riding boots.

Oh, hello?… What’s this in my comments box? It seems to be a piece of spam from someone called… Oh, I can’t read the name, it looks to me like Japanese.
Fake clock after-sales service. Omega Watches Seamaster super copy watches Omega copy Seamaster Planet Ocean Chrono fake watch shop omega super copy shop, Japan finest discount high quality OMEGA watch super copy N class goods sold mail order.
Well, whatever your name is, thank you for commenting. I shall certainly bear in mind what you have said, and I look forward to hearing from you again in the coming weeks.

A single overheard remark:
‘She’s going to do it naturally from now on…’

An observation:
All the people in town today had the look of fish about them…

Recently I have been getting confused between the ibis and the ibex… I must get it sorted out before next Wednesday…

‘It was the afterglow…’
‘The afterglow?’
‘The afterglow of what?’
‘Why, of a glow of course…’
‘Oh right… a glow…’

A single overheard remark:
‘Just give it a good spray Kelvin…’

Hm, well, on balance then, I think I’d rather be ever so slightly famous for my art around the digital world, rather than be very famous in the real world here in Dulltown…

‘So Dave, if you were suddenly given millions and millions of pounds, what would you do with it?…’
‘Gosh… well, I’d… I’d buy lots and lots of Britart from the last thirty years, Tracey E, Damien H, that sort of thing…’
‘What, as an investment?’
‘No, no, so I could set fire to it. It would make a lovely blaze…’
‘Ah Dave, I love your irony…’
‘No, really, I’d set fire to it, the world would be a much better place without all that…’
‘Of course Dave, your destruction of these works could be viewed as a great conceptual artwork itself…’
‘Oh shut up!… Go and get me another tea and a bun!…’

A single overheard remark:
‘He was just like Worzel Gummins…’

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in art, brain, conversation, cool, Dulltown, existentialism, Grumpiness, Hull.UK., humour, information, irony, observations, serendipity, style, surrealism, thinking, words and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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