Stella and the baleful moon…

But first…
Dulltown, Europe: Today’s unusual pencil sharpener is the one shaped like the voice of Morgan Freeman.

DSCN0163Landscape No. 93. (2010) Pastel and crayon on paper, about 24″ x 18″.

‘This one makes me want to yawn David…’
‘Oh, how charming and tactful you are this morning Stella my dear – and by the way, why don’t you call me ‘Dave’ as everyone else does? I do find it a bit annoying that you…’
‘This tea tastes a bit funny David, it’s not proper Taylors of Harrogate Yorkshire Tea, is it?’
‘Yes it is… It’s those mint humbugs you were eating when you came in, they are making your tea taste a bit…’
‘Ha! What?’
‘These fig rolls taste a bit funny too…’
‘So, why does my drawing make you feel like yawning my dear?… If you don’t mind me asking…’
‘I fancy a ginger biscuit. Have you got any ginger biscuits David?’
‘You won’t like them, they’ve gone a bit soft… So why does…’
‘Oh, I’ll try a couple… It’s because I’ve seen this drawing before.’
‘No, you haven’t Stella. You’ve seen one a bit similar to it though.’
‘So why do you keep turning out things that are so ‘similar’ David?’
‘I don’t!… and anyway, it’s called “having a style” Stella…’
‘These ginger nuts aren’t really very nice… but if I dunk them I think I’ll manage to eat one or two… Is it a junk yard then?… It looks like a junk yard… I can see where you are coming from…’
‘Where “I’m coming from” Stella?’
‘Mm… By using colour and form, you are contrasting naturally occurring features and phenomena with those fashioned by us arrogant filthy humans; our hard shapes and jarring colours, our eye-catching gewgaws and trashy cheap surfaces, now rotting away, made to attract the ill-educated poor bastard consumers to get them to part with their hard-earned currency… But I do like your baleful moon David…’
“Baleful” Stella?…’
‘Hm… Oh look, that’s obviously a tilting oil drum, half buried in the slim, there in the foreground David – I definitely see what you are saying there!…’
‘Do you?…’
‘I do… Pass the rest of the ginger nuts over, I’m getting a taste for them, soft and bendy though they are… You know you shouldn’t use ultramarine for skies David, cerulean with a bit of white is much more realistic…’
‘More tea my dear?’
‘Alright… or even sky blue would do…’
‘What about sky-blue pink Stella?’
‘Shut up, you oaf!…’

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in art, brain, colours, conversation, drawing, food, green, Grumpiness, humour, information, painting, style, surrealism and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Stella and the baleful moon…

  1. julie harms says:

    “Well, I think it looks like a big caterpillar, or maybe a psychedelic accordion stuffed with Kraft cheese slices. Actually it’s something that is totally edible, I know !!! it’s a caterpillar sandwich !”
    “what do you think Stella ?”

    I like it 🙂

    • Dave Whatt says:

      I’m afraid Stella can’t comment at the moment, she’d still stuffing her face with ginger nuts and guzzling tea… Thank you JH!…

      • julie harms says:

        I understand, Ginger Nuts and Guzzling Tea are the most exciting ‘5 o’clock tea couple’ since Fruit Cake and Cider went missing in the summer of ’62.
        Thanks for following my blog and may cookies and tea always be available for the stuffing of our stomachs and the comforts of our souls. Amen.

      • Dave Whatt says:

        And thank you too!…

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