Just some small items…

But first…
Dulltown, Europe: Today’s elephant in the room is the one behind the curtain, look, you can see part of his trunk sticking out…

Excuses for being late. No. 259.
I’m sorry I’m late, but I had to thoroughly sanitise my door knocker.

A single overheard remark:
‘It was an absolute shamble…’ (just the one apparently)

Damn! I’m always mixing up Stanley Spencer, Spencer Tracy, and Kevin Spacey. Oh, hang on, what about that famous painter Spacer Trency?… (ST)

‘Hello George, how’s your son doing?’
‘Hm, not very well…’
‘Oh dear…’
‘Yes, went into banking, and now he’s thoroughly trapped in money…’
‘Oh, how awful for you…’
‘There’s no hope I’m afraid, and he’s just been promoted!’
‘Oh dear, that’s so sad… I’m sorry to hear that George…’

I’m thinking of changing my name to Ann Ekdote so people will say that I’m amusing.

An observation:
There was a young couple in front of me in the queue at the supermarket checkout. She was carrying a wire basket containing one or two items of grocery, and he had his arm around her waist. In his free hand he was holding a large (not yet paid for) meat and salad sandwich, half out of its packaging. He was taking big bites from it, chewing and swallowing, and then insisting on kissing the girl. He went through this sequence repeatedly as the queue moved slowly towards the till. I really couldn’t bear to watch; I kept my head down and pretended to be very interested in what I had in my basket…

Yes sir, How can I help you?’
‘I’m looking for some new accommodation for my pigs…’
‘Would you like to see our sty list sir?’
‘You have a stylist?’
‘Of course sir…’

A single overheard remark:
‘I really do need my joists looking at…’

‘I hear that you don’t have a mobile phone.’
‘Is that right?…’
‘That’s ridiculous!…’
‘Is it?… Right ho…’

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in art, brain, conversation, cool, dreaming, existentialism, food, humour, information, irony, jobs, money, observations, painting, surrealism, words and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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