A few titchy items…

But first…
Dulltown, Europe: Today’s unusual pencil sharpener is the one shaped like the taste of Edam cheese.

Excuses for being late. No. 260.
I’m sorry I’m late, but my best woolly jumper was covered in thistle burrs.

A single overheard remark:
‘And the hamster’s costing more that we thought…’

‘Excuse me…’
‘Why do you talk in that strange sing-song way, in that funny voice… as if every word needs emphasising… as if each word is somehow precious…?’
‘I’m a poet…’
‘Ah, right…’

What’s this in my comments box? Oh, it’s yet another piece of spam. It’s from someone called cheap football.
‘of our overburdened landfills.Effective personal productivity is not now working harder but getting the most important items other ways to solve “the Greek question.” But there is a very good offer of French It is also pos-sible to show how a libertarian paternalist might select among the possible options sensations that come along with panic attacks. And just a reminder to my fellow Saints fans-we’
Well, thank you cheap football, I will certainly bear in mind what you have said, and I look forward to hearing from you again soon.

I’ve just noticed that all the Dulltown bus drivers are fat and middle-aged, and that they remind me of those crime scene detectives on TV who do lots of sweating and sneering as they go about their unpleasant work.

‘What? You had cross aunts for breakfast?’
‘Yes, they are French you know.’

I’m thinking of changing my name to Carrie Smattick.

A single overheard remark:
‘I’m in love again… apparently…’

Hey, I was just listening to a song about art on my MP3 player – there aren’t many songs written about art – and no, it wasn’t that toe-curlingly saccharine ‘Vincent (Starry starry night)‘ by Don McLean, it was one by the Rezzillos called ‘My Baby Does Good Sculptures‘.
The first line goes, ‘She don’t care, for one night stands, or naughty boys, with sweaty hands… She’s got a thing, about carving wood…’ and goes on to tell us that he loves his baby ‘coz she does good sculptures, yeah!…
How very refreshing!…

A single overheard remark:
‘Bus should believing…’


About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in art, brain, conversation, Dulltown, existentialism, Hull.UK., humour, information, jobs, music, observations, overheard, poetry, sculpture, serendipity, surrealism, words and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to A few titchy items…

  1. Michael says:

    I saw the Rezillos/Revillos at Hull University c1981. All I can remember is that Eugene had a suit with lightbulbs on it…

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