Is that you nimming?…

But first…
Dulltown, Europe: Today’s unusual pencil sharpener is the one shaped like the nucleus of the zirconium atom.

‘Excuse me…’
‘You’re nimming.’
‘Am I?’
‘Yes, look at your knee.’
‘What of it?’
‘Well, this bus seat isn’t that spacious, and I have become aware of your nimming next to my lower leg.’
‘Well, maybe you should move your leg a bit, get it out of the way, perhaps a bit closer to your other one… more towards the aisle?’
‘I just did…’
‘…and you moved your nimming leg out a bit more, and I could feel it against my…’
‘Alright… How’s that? There’s a good clear inch-and-a-half between our calves now.’
‘Thank you.’
‘You’re welcome.’
‘Excuse me…’
‘What now?’
‘You’re still nimming.’
‘Well, I…’
‘Look, my leg is nowhere near yours now… What’s the problem?’
‘I can see it going, I can detect its movement, out of the corner of my eye.’
‘Well, look away then – look out of the window perhaps, or maybe close your eyes for the duration of the journey.’
‘But I can sense it encroaching through the vibration of the seat upholstery.’
‘Good god!…’
‘I wonder…’
‘I wonder, could you possibly stop nimming?’
‘That would be very difficult for me.’
‘Oh, why?’
‘I have anti-nimming pills from the doctor, and unfortunately I forgot to take one this morning.’
‘I don’t believe you.’
‘No, really it’s true!’
‘Anti-nimming pills indeed! I’ve never heard of such a thing!…’
‘Perhaps you should be a bit less sensitive to such minor issues.’
‘And how would I possibly do that?… You, you… nimmer!’
‘Get some nimming tolerance pills?’
‘Look… look, at your leg, you are nimming too now.’
‘Damn! Damn! Damn!… You’ve passed it on to me! I’m infected! The whole seat is shaking!’
‘Come on, let’s try to synchronise, if we carry on out of step like this we’ll tear the bus to pieces… Look, the people in front are nimming too… If it spreads to the driver we’ve all had it!…’


About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in brain, conversation, drama, existentialism, Grumpiness, humour, people, physics, surrealism, words. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Is that you nimming?…

  1. memadtwo says:

    I’ll have to try that word on my daughters…(K)

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