Enquire Within. (8). ‘Extremely unfit for human ears…’

But first…
Dulltown, Europe: Today’s very special guests are the Elvis Presley lookalike twins Maud and Jerry Munth; come on in you two, put your guitars down, and join us on the sofa.

Today, how about another delve into the distant past?
See, I reach up and I take a rather nondescript hardback from my bookshelf, yes, it’s that old junk shop book, The Daily Express Enquire Within from 1934. Here is a picture of the title page – That’s a lovely globe emblem, isn’t it?…

DSCN4009This is a handy compendium of items often needed in one’s daily life – well, one’s daily life in 1934. Let’s select a few pages at random. I’ll include the interesting homilies and titbits of useful information that appear at the head of each page too.

Page 367. (Little comforts beget much happiness.)
Caterpillars. – To destroy caterpillars… Dissolve one ounce of arsenic of soda in water, add it to sixteen gallons of water; dissolve three ounces of acetate of lead in water, and add this to the mixture, with a little paraffin emulsion, and spray the bushes etc. thoroughly.

Page 285. (If none endeavour, there would be an end to discovery.)
Stopping for teeth. – Take an old silver thimble, an old silver coin, or other silver article, and with a very fine file convert it into filings. Sift through gauze to separate the coarse from fine particles. Take the finer portion, and mix with sufficient quicksilver to form a stiff amalgam, and while in this state, fill the cavities of the decayed teeth.
Caution. – As it turns black under the action of the acids of the mouth it should be used sparingly for front teeth.

Page 347. (He doeth well who doeth good to those of his own brotherhood.)
If you feel your Intellectual Superiority to anyone with whom you are conversing, do not seek to bear him down; it would be an inglorious triumph, and a breach of good manners. Beware too of speaking light of subjects which bear a sacred character.

Page 160. (First Co-operative Congress held in London in 1869.)
Cautions in Bezique. – In playing Bezique, it is best to keep your tens till you can make them count; to retain your sequence cards as long as possible; to declare a royal marriage previous to declaring a sequence or double Bezique; to make sure of the last trick but one in order to prevent your opponent from declaring.

Page 357. ( When wine sinks, words swim.)
Avoid Swearing. – An oath is but the wrath of a perturbed spirit. A man of high moral standing would rather treat an offence with contempt that show his indignation by an oath… It is indecent, offensive to delicacy, and extremely unfit for human ears. It is wicked, violating the Devine law, and provoking the displeasure of Him Who will not hold him guiltless who takes His Name in vain.

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
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6 Responses to Enquire Within. (8). ‘Extremely unfit for human ears…’

  1. memadtwo says:

    Beware of Him Who…perhaps he’s a friend of that dictator in Korea…

  2. I am horrified…..poor little caterpillars!!

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