A few titchy items…

But first…
Dulltown, Europe: Today’s joke is the one about the prime minister’s hat, the donkey, the half-eaten pizza, and the white-faced clown. Oh, how we chuckled and guffawed in the back of the limousine!…

Excuses for being late. No. 293.
I’m sorry I’m late, but I was gripped by an image of Putin pouting.

A single overheard remark:
‘…and I was like, whoa, don’t like it!…’

An observation:
A big Dulltown man shouting down his phone on the crowded bus:
‘Hello! Hello!… Hello!… Hello!
No, buddy, no… No… Was it about the noise, last night?
No… No… Right, I’d had a few beers and…
…yeah buddy, and I had the music up a bit loud and…
No… No…
Sorry buddy… No… Sorry…’

An observation:
All the people in town yesterday had noticeably deep frown lines on their foreheads, including the small children…

‘It’s the secret of enjoying life…’
‘Eh?… What is?’
‘It’s a two-way thing you know.’
‘Is it?…’
‘Yes, things inwards, and things outwards.’
‘Is this about religion?’
‘No… People think that consuming makes them happier.’
‘Yes, when you are young, you enjoy eating, smoking, drinking, getting stoned, and buying new stuff, but you can’t do that forever, they all eventually make you ill and dissatisfied, and when you finally have to stop enjoying eating, smoking, drinking, and getting stoned, and buying stuff, you really don’t have anything else.’
‘S’pose not… So?…’
‘So, instead of consuming, you learn to give stuff out…’
‘What’s that mean?’
‘Well, you get pleasure and satisfaction from being a bit creative, be an artist, a photographer, play the ukulele, write stuff, make things out of wood, be a gardener, learn to juggle…’
‘Well, maybe not juggle… But the thing is, you gradually get better at all these things, it’s all positive, you amuse other people, and it gives your life a bit of purpose… Giving stuff out, rather than taking it in… Get it?’
‘Fancy another pint?’

I thought I was suffering from noia, but the doctor reassured me that it wasn’t the full thing, but only paranoia.

I’m thinking of changing my name to Clay Mound.

A single overheard remark:
‘Well the birthday card was a little bit rude-ish…’

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in art, brain, conversation, creation, existentialism, food, Hull.UK., humour, information, joke, learning, music, observations, overheard, photography, smoking, surrealism, thinking, words and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to A few titchy items…

  1. I juggle. I can do 2 apples and an orange. I have poi that I swing around, and I also play the didgeridoo sometimes but it scares the dog so I don’t do it so much. And yes, everyone in my town frowns a lot as well, or have faces set to “grim determination” mode. 🙂

  2. But what about the overheard remark from two ladies in Tesco trying to buy wine for one of their partners, wondering if he likes this one or that one & whether they should ring him. Then deciding to “take a consecutive decision”?

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