Some reasonably interesting small items…

But first…
Dulltown, UK: Today’s gorilla is the one in the Bermuda shorts, wearing sunglasses, talking on his phone, over there on the lounger by the pool…

Excuses for being late. No. 304.
I’m sorry I’m late, but I urgently needed to de-crumb my toaster.

A single overheard remark:
‘Ow!… That’s my foot Emerald!…’

So, which one do you think will win the 2016 World Grinning and Staring With Mad Eyes Contest – Richard Branson or his pal Tony Blair? (RB) (TB)

‘What?… What?… Abandon ship?’
‘No no, there’s a band, on the ship…’
‘Ah right… Phew!…’

‘So you see, guitar strings come in different thicknesses called ‘gauges’, you can have heavy, medium, light, and extra light, there are some specially for electric guitars, some for acoustic guitars. Some strings are plain steel and some are wound around with thinner wire to give them…’
‘Stop it! Stop it! I have enough on my plate without getting into String Theory!…’ (ST)

There was a crow in my neighbour’s garden; it was up in a tree making its typical crow sound. But it really did sound like it was shouting, ‘Far out!… Far out!… Far Out!…’

Oh, what’s this, in today’s comments box? Ah, it’s an item of spam – it seem to be from someone called St. Louis Browns Jerseys:
appended to lists that you already have by comparing it to other lists. By appending demographic onto the ball entirely too long. 5. Take down those curtains and replace them with blinds. make you get out of bed in the morning ready and excited about your day? These This could make you a happier and more full of energy person total.Unique License means buying
Well, thank you St. Louis Browns Jerseys, I will certainly bear in mind what you have said, and I do hope to hear from you again soon.

Yes, I think I’m going to change my name to Edgar Allan Poem.

‘Bloody hell! What was that loud bang?…’
‘Oh, it’s alright it was just that angry wobbly man shutting the door of pub as he left.’
‘Ah… would you call him, a slam drunk then?’
‘A slam dunk?’
‘No, a slam drunk…’
‘Oh, if you say so… Fancy another beer?’

A single overheard remark:
‘I went whoo! I was talking to like, a zombie!…’


About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
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10 Responses to Some reasonably interesting small items…

  1. I think TB wins the staring eyed grimace contest. His eyes have no life in them – at least RB grins in a vaguely genuine way. Regarding the spam mail – I was intrigued how blinds and not curtains can make you excited about your day – I always end up waking up at 5am because the sun starts streaming in. Excited? no…grumpy, yes! And the drunk wobbly man exiting the pub reminds me of when a taxi drew up outside a pub down the road, and the driver began yelling “Taxi for Allah? Allah, anyone?”

  2. Claudia says:

    Sometimes there are entire conversations going on in my Spam folder. Who ARE these aliens? And why do they choose to converse in MY back yard? Ahhh…another question for the cosmos…

    • Dave Whatt says:

      I find them quite intriguing – perhaps they are written by machines, or are they just really bad translations from some other language?… Oh, but what fun they are!…

  3. memadtwo says:

    That last remark is perfect…

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