Snapped on the bus…

But first…
Dulltown, UK: Today’s instruction is to remove the arris using coarse sandpaper, carefully chisel out the notches marked ‘A’ ‘B’ and ‘D’, but leave difficult notch ‘C’ untouched until later in the day; rout out the central slots to take the steel sliding members and wax the internal edges with a stub of candle. Stand peacefully by the workshop door and smoke two cigarettes before addressing notch ‘C’.

‘Oh Dave! Why don’t you take nice photographs, like other people do? You know – pretty spring flowers, a colourful sunset, a fluffy fat bird sitting on a twig with the background deliberately out of focus, a skateboarder caught frozen hanging in mid-air, some brightly coloured racing cars whizzing round a track, a close-up of a shiny green frog’s squat little face, a grinning baby or two, a pensive girlfriend sitting on some urban grass holding a guitar awkwardly and pretending to play it, some clouds from the window of a plane, a majestic cathedral with a dramatic sky in crisp black and white?… You know, that sort of thing…’
‘Well I…’
‘No! You seem to go out of your way to photograph boring and meaningless things – look at this one! It’s just some bus seats with a stupid cartoon face looking in the window, and that’s not even in the centre of the picture, you couldn’t even get that right, it should be in the middle, everyone knows that!’
‘Well I…’
‘I mean… if there had been someone sitting in one of those seats it would have been better – perhaps a grizzled old man with a walking stick and rheumy eyes… then it could have been in black and white to fully show up the wrinkles in his cheeks – and his unruly whiskers…’
‘Oh, shut up!…’


About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in art, composition, conversation, creation, Hull.UK., humour, information, instruction, observations, photography, seeing, serendipity, surrealism, words and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Snapped on the bus…

  1. Oh earlybird this morning, aren’t we? I like photo a lot! Its almost as if the cheeky face is checking to see if there is anyone he knows on the bus. That happens a lot up here…..each time a bus goes by, faces (grumpy, mind you) lift to see if there is anyone they know on the passing vehicle. Similarly ON the bus, grumpy faces stare out to see a recognisable face on the street – whereupon much sudden window banging and gesturing is usually undertaken, with the recognised street person replying with similar gestures, and whistling. Oh the cultures of society….. 😀

  2. Shammy says:

    Nice nautical theme on the bus upholstery…..

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s