Some small but pithy items…

But first…
Dulltown, UK: Today’s Raymond Chandler quotation is from his 1943 novel The High Window:
In a swivel chair at the desk sat an elderly party in a dark grey suit with high lapels and too many buttons down the front. He had some stringy white hair which grew long enough to tickle his ears. A pale grey bald patch loomed high up in the middle of it, like a rock above the timberline. Fuzz grew out of his ears, far enough to catch a moth.

Excuses for being late. No. 332.
I’m sorry I’m late, but I was filling my bird feeder with dried dead mealworms.

A single overheard remark:
‘No, no, it was Christine and her metronome…’

An observation:
Half the people in town today were walking along looking back over their shoulders – the other half were dodging and weaving trying to not bump into them.

On the TV the other evening I noticed that there was a documentary on one of the world’s biggest asteroid impacts, it apparently occurred in Scotland a very long time ago. It sounded interesting so I decided to watch it. A few minutes in I realised that Dr Tori Herridge, the presenter of the piece, would be presenting it as if to an audience of four-year-old children, using enthusiastic facial expressions, and giggling, and blinking eyes, and placing special emphasis on almost every word in her sentences. What a pity, I would have liked to have known more about that asteroid… (Link)

‘Yes dear?’
‘Why do doctors earn so much more money that bus drivers?’
‘Well dear…’
‘I mean, if either of them get it wrong people die don’t they?…’
‘Well, yes dear they do… but I suppose it’s easier for the doctors to cover it up though… You know, I’d never thought of it like that before… Thank you.’
‘Your welcome Mum.’

I am always eager to see what spam has popped up in my comments box in the morning. See now, what’s this little one? It seems to be from someone called business ideas eux:
‘I was suggested this web site via my cousin. I am not certain whether or not this publish is written by way of him as nobody else recognise such distinct approximately my problem. You are wonderful! Thanks.’
Yes indeed business ideas eux, I am wonderful – and I do hope to hear some more compliments from you very soon – do write again, I can take any amount of this.

In the cafe that I frequent they always have music playing over the loudspeakers, sometimes it is louder sometimes it is quieter, but it is always there; at the time of day that I usually go in I tend to hear the same songs, there is probably a single disc of MP3s that plays all day. There is one song that I find particularly annoying. It sounds like something by another of these young guitar-strumming singer-song-writer people. The gist of the song seems to be that he is, for some reason, unable to ‘get away’. There’s not a lot to the piece, but he does repeat the lines ‘you can’t get away’ and ‘no, you can’t get away’ rather a lot. The other day, out of curiosity I counted them – he sang the line 23 times – and it isn’t a long song…

I’m thinking of changing my name to Beverly Hills-Tann.

A single overheard remark:
‘I got a bacon nose…’

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in archeology, books, brain, cafe, conversation, Dulltown, existentialism, Grumpiness, history, humour, information, misheard, music, observations, overheard, people, reading, serendipity, surrealism, TV, writing and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Some small but pithy items…

  1. Dana Doran says:

    I’m refinishing a lovely outdoor bench, so in preparation I was driving to the paint store to consult with the “experts.” As I pulled into the parking lot, I had to slam on my brakes for a lady who entered the lane on foot while texting on her phone….she no sooner cleared the road and I proceeded to stop again, for a man fixated on his smart phone (sauntering slowly, unaware of being in a driving lane.) Determined to get to the paint store, I started up again to immediately stop (beginning to think that I would never reach my final destination, just 200 feet ahead)….for a couple, walking side-by-side, you guessed it, each entranced by some electronic object! They even stopped in the middle of the lane to text, laugh and then turn around and walk back in the direction from which they came. I gave up driving and parked. The point? I think the pedestrians here are spying on your pedestrians, which is why they are given to looking over their shoulders.

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