Stella likes my fluffiness…

But first…
Dulltown, UK: Today’s existential angst is centred around the sound of the word odeon.
(Odeon: in ancient Greek and Roman times, a building built for singing exercises, musical shows and poetry competitions.)

Untitled drawing. 1987. Charcoal on paper probably about 20″ x 14″.

‘David, did you know there’s a note for the postal worker, concerning the delivery of parcels, pinned on your front door?’
‘Ah, yes, I sent off for a set of Klusons, they came yesterday, I’d better take it down.’
‘Hm… an elegant design are Klusons… Good morning Stella my dear! Can I interest you in a beverage and a small item of confectionery perhaps?’
‘Yes David, you can – you know what beverage I require, what buns and or biscuits do you have in for me? And what in god’s name is this piece of…?’
‘I put the kettle on a few minutes ago… You see, when I left art college back in…’
‘I don’t need your life story you oaf! Just tell me what this ropey drawing is supposed to be.’
‘I have half a packet of cheap bourbon biscuits in the kitchen, they’re only slightly stale, and I have a chocolate muffin in a paper bag I brought back from Nero’s. Here’s your tea, you fat gannet.’
‘Ha! I’ve never been fat and you know it! Is this proper Taylors of Harrogate Yorkshire Tea David?’
‘Why do you still call me David, when I have countless times asked you not to, everyone else calls me Dave.’
‘I’ll have that muffin, and I might toy with the stale bourbons later – so it was 1987, was it?’
‘Yes, it was… you see, in the years after art school you tend to be rather confused as to what the hell to do; at college there is a reason to do art, but after you leave, you find…’
‘Mm… this tea’s really great, this is a Nero’s muffin you say? It’s not at all bad.’
‘Oh… I thought that we might have shared it, but I see that you’ve already…’
‘So, a period of artistic pointlessness?’
‘Hm, so after a fairly barren period, I realised that now that I no longer had people looking over my shoulder I could do what ever I wanted, so I fancied messing with charcoal. Charcoal is quick, you see.’
‘Yes Stella my dear, you can really go at it, bang it on, rub it out, smudge it around a bit, all very quick… Would you like to try one of these bourbons?’
‘So, who are these ghastly people then?’
‘I came across a photo in an old copy of the local paper, some office or other had just got a computer, perhaps it was the local council?’
‘That’s the machine in the centre. The top executives were posing around it for the publicity – two stiffs in suits and a woman, third in place, looking rather uncomfortable next to them.’
‘I like her eyes David, they look like Charles Grodin’s suspicious ironic eyes – and I like the fact that she doesn’t have a mouth. What you are suggesting there, of course, is that she doesn’t need one in that oppressive male environment… Those bourbons weren’t too bad David, let’s have some more tea!’
‘I also like the way you’ve truncated the three figures and put them on plinths, just like the monitor, and I do like your slapdash, fluffy, carefree, surrealist style with the old charcoal David.’
‘Fluffy?… Do you Stella? Thank you…’

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
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7 Responses to Stella likes my fluffiness…

  1. Dana Doran says:

    Light and fluffy! Stella was right…of course, there is that sense of overwhelming prediction of insidious doom….all those data bits on the screen, 1111111111111…

    • Dave Whatt says:

      Insidious Doom – what a jolly good band they were!… I have them on vinyl you know…
      (I just had to Google ‘Insidious Doom’ to make sure they weren’t a real band!…)

      • Dana Doran says:

        That IS funny, because, well, frankly I’m surprised there isn’t one….what a good name for a band! Instead they chose Alt J (I’m afraid to try this function on my laptop [alt j] because I guess life must hold some mystery, right?) But then again:

      • Dave Whatt says:

        No, I daren’t try alt-J either… Although I could try it from under a thick blanket with a stick (or two sticks) from a safe distance.
        But those lads do seem to be a suitably weird band. What a gritty video!…

  2. ktz2 says:

    plinths plinths plinths…right up there with ‘pithy’. . haha..
    I love that you have a collection of people with long elaborate conversations keeping you company in your head! hahaha

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