Just a few short, but pithy items…

But first…
Dulltown, UK: Today’s dictionary words are: acarus, abstrict, abrooke, abricock, acaulescent, acceptilation, and blate. Please have these words looked up and placed in suitable sentences ready for Professor Mouldie first thing after breakfast tomorrow morning. The professor will be awarding marks for well polished shoes, smartly combed hair, and for anything that makes him frown or laugh out loud.

Excuses for being late. No. 337.
I’m sorry I’m late, but I got to pondering on the Crab Nebula.

A single overheard remark:
‘You are on the back foot Sarah!…’

‘We tick all the boxes.’
‘Tickle the boxes?…’
‘That’s what I said Tom!…’

An observation:
Lying on the otherwise empty cafe table next to mine, I noticed, caught by a shaft of oblique sunlight raking across from the window, a very long, white, or possibly blonde, hair. It had obviously been shed and left there by a previous customer.
Now, I thought, If I were some sort of criminal, I would pick that up, put it in my pocket and keep it, so I could leave it at the scene of my next crime – that would really fox the forensic detectives when they come to process the room!…
Yes, I probably do watch too many ‘real-life’ TV crime shows.

Ah good! A nice piece of spam has just appeared in my comments box. It seems to be from someone called OllyLinux:
Whenrver you elect to freelance, additionally, you will be accountable foor your own schedule. Instead of being certain tto the 9-t0-five work day of mos regulation offices, each yourr daay by day schedule and your calendar as a complete will probably be the large! as much as you. Whether its worthwhile to tke the time off, or whether you wish to tackle a heavier workload will meet your needs.
Well, thank you OllyLinux, I will certainly bear in mind what you have said, especially with regard to mos regulation, and I do hope to hear from you again very soon.

He had a mouth that looked it had done quite a lot of sulking over the years…

An observation:
A teenage girl got on the bus and threw herself down in seat in front of me. She took out her phone, held it up in front of her, and started tapping at it. I couldn’t help but see what she was typing.
‘I’m past the point of shame…’ it began.
I decided not to read any more…

Yes, I’m thinking of changing my name to Dan Gling-Froot.

A single overheard remark:
‘Look, we can check the trout when we get outside!…’

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in brain, cafe, conversation, cool, drama, existentialism, Hull.UK., humour, instruction, observations, overheard, people, phones, science, serendipity, surrealism and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Just a few short, but pithy items…

  1. ktz2 says:

    The sulking mouth sentence has a Raymond Chandler-ish feel to it (that’s a good thing!)

  2. Dana Doran says:

    You are not the only one that watches way too many reality television crime shows….but, first, please take the time to read the credits….do you ever wonder why they have three or four writers for a reality production? Sometimes I can’t abrooke the title of “reality” being thrown about so casually! I’ve been known to stand in front of the screen with a tea cozy (lined with foil, of course) on my head screaming “when will I be blessed with acceptilation?!” As to that long white or blonde hair….left there for you by Simon Doom, hoping you would think it would look quite nice to have a long blonde hair draped over your shoulder (like a fox fur), touting your recent…..well, be careful with that hair, you don’t know where it has been now, do you?

    • Dave Whatt says:

      Me, I like the man on those shows with the kind and considerate sounding voice who does the voice-overs – I like the way he relishes the unpleasantness and upset by gently altering his tone – they probably teach that in drama school…
      Really he probably doesn’t give a shit… Speaking of actors, don’t you pity the poor souls who can’t get proper acting work and have to play the bodies and the perps in these things?
      The long blonde hair – hm, actually I just flicked it to the floor with a paper napkin…

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