Yet not uncomfortable to the touch…

But first…
Dulltown, UK: Today’s ancient Egyptian deity, appearing as a man with a goose, or a red crown, on his head, is the God Geb. He is from Heliopolis and his attributes are earth and fertility. (Geb)

Dave, let’s reach up and get that silly book of yours from the top of the bookshelf…
Which one? I have lots of silly books…
Yes, this is quite a boring and drab looking one, so it’s not really worth a photograph of the cover, but here is a picture of the title page to whet your appetite:

It’s 1954!…
No, it isn’t – that’s just the sort of thing the BBC say when they are trying to draw you into some dreary documentary about war, or economics, or social history, or… anything…
But, back in the UK in the 1950s money was short and people maintained and repaired the things they had instead of throwing them away and buying new ones as we do today – and they invented and constructed useful items for the home and the garden – there was even a regular publication for such pursuits, the Gadgets Magazine:
There are two or three items per page, some with nice little accompanying drawings – here are a few titles picked at random: Small Gaskets for Every Job; How to Improvise Insulated Staples; Handy Scoops From Old Tins; Adapt a Play-Pen for Airing Clothes; How to Cure a Slipping Boot or Shoe Tongue; A De-Greasing Solution!, etc.

‘It’s just the thing for wintry nights Madge…’
‘Sorry Albert, did you say something?’
‘Yes, dear, it’s just the thing for wintry nights…’
‘Oh?… What is?… Have you got your nose in that silly magazine again?’
‘Well, yes, but it’s not silly dear – it’s full of interesting and useful…’
‘It’s a waste of money, and the things that you make are always…’
‘Ah, but you wait until winter comes, you’ll be glad of this very clever device here on page three, all we need are a couple of…’
‘Have you finished with that cup of tea?’
‘Not quite Madge, but perhaps a top-up from the pot if you’d… thank you dear… It would be simple as ABC to make, here, have a look.’
‘Hm… do we have any cooking tins that we don’t already use for cooking Albert?’
‘Well, I…’
‘And, you think we are going to snuggle up with – with, metal tins, with electricity running through them, that you have wired up yourself – something you admit you are not an expert at?’
‘No, you see Madge, the idea is that we take them out of the bed before we get in – we’ll be as snug as bugs in rugs Madge.’
‘We have hot water bottles, haven’t we?’
‘Well… It would have been an interesting project though. I wonder how you fasten the tins together – the writer seems to avoid going into detail on that, doesn’t he?’
‘A clip or a strap Albert…’
‘Hm…  a “clip or strap”?… Any ginger nuts left Madge?’
‘Here, and if you dunk, don’t drop bits onto you clean shirt front…’
‘Of course not dear… Yes, rubber hot water bottles are a far better idea… Good thinking Madge…’

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in archeology, books, brain, conversation, design, history, humour, information, instruction, serendipity, weather and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to Yet not uncomfortable to the touch…

  1. Jheron Bash says:

    What are protographic solutions, Albert?

  2. If you made a lot of them and lined them up over the bed, you wouldn’t have warm spots and cold spots. It would be like a blanket of heat. Oh, wait……

  3. Dana Doran says:

    So just below your comments section, in the “More on” section there was an ad for a magazine parody blog by Cullum Rogers – from 1954. Hahahahaha. You might want to take a look –

    • Dave Whatt says:

      As soon as I went to this post I thought the drawing style looked like that of MAD Magazine – and sure enough that’s what it was! The quality of the drawing is so good – very old-style, a bit like good old Robert Crumb, don’t you think?
      I used to see the odd copy of MAD when I was a kid – I admired the excellent drawing, but it felt very ‘alien’ (American) and it did scare me a bit… It was so very un-British…

      • Dana Doran says:

        And so cold war…….Spy v. Spy Loved Robert Crumb! I wasn’t the one purchasing MAD – my little brother did….then I snuck it away and read it. I guess I was spending my money on batteries for my transistor radio.

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