Bird talk…

But first…
Dulltown, UK: Today’s heraldic term is Label – a difference mark across the chief of the shield applied to the arms of a son, usually the heir. (Label)

‘Let me ask you something…’
‘As a dove – you are a dove, aren’t you?’
‘Well yes…’
‘So, as a dove, what do you think of parrots?’
‘Well, I don’t know really, they’re alright I suppose. You’re a pigeon, what do you think of them?’
‘They are a bit bright, don’t you think?’
‘In what sense?’
‘In both senses…’
‘Yes, the humans think so…’
‘They think parrots are pretty intelligent, as well as being bright looking.’
‘Bright looking?’
‘Ah, right… They’re a little bit too flashy for my taste though.’
‘Hm, then there’s the mimicry.’
‘Oh, yes, that’s clever I suppose – but me, I’ve never bothered with the mimicry.’
‘Me neither, there’s no need for it is there? I find it a bit demeaning.’
‘Yes, they are just ingratiating themselves with the humans – being cute, just to get their heads rubbed!’
‘Have they no dignity? Mind you, having your head rubbed is quite nice.’
‘Yes, but those parrots are an embarrassment to us all.’
‘Yes indeed!’
‘Have you noticed a lot of our young birds seem to be in thrall of parrots.’
‘In what?’
‘Thrall! Thrall!…’
‘You sound a bit like a crow.’
‘Oh shut up! Yes, the youngsters watch parrots closely all the time – they adore them, they want to be like them.’
‘Yes! It’s a creeping trend, even amongst the fledglings.’
‘But they don’t have the colour or the style of their idols – our birds are too drab to…’
‘Hey! We’re not drab, we are subtle – not brash and gaudy – all that bright red and yellow, it’s not decent! And, I don’t know why they come over here anyway! It’s not right!’
‘Actually a couple of my best friends are parrots.’
‘I know a cockatoo too…’
‘A cockatoo too?’
‘Bloody cockatoos! Too cute, and far too cocky!…’
‘So, our young birds want to be like parrots?’
‘Do they do the mimicry then?’
‘No, it’s too hard – beaks are the wrong shape.’
‘I see, so, what do they…?’
‘It’s just the general style of the parrot, the swagger, the attitude, you know, the cool, that certain snappy look that tropical birds have – all the kids are trying to copy it – oh, what’s it called?’
‘Parrot fashion?’
‘Yes, yes, that’s it!… It was on the tip of my beak…’


About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
This entry was posted in colours, conversation, cool, drama, heraldry, humour, information, style, surrealism and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Bird talk…

  1. Jheron Bash says:

    Bloody parrots – come over here taking our jobs …
    Barry Beak 🐤

  2. Sharon Mann says:

    haha, I was at the zoo yesterday and the parrots were there in all of their glory squawking and flapping their wings.

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