So Dave, do you live in an appropriate environment?…

But first…
Dulltown, UK/Europe: Today’s unusual pencil sharpener is the one shaped like a bit of spume caught up in the wind on the esplanade on a stormy winter’s day.

As you probably know already dear reader, I live in a rather run-down part of Dulltown; I have never been one for seeking well-paid employment so that I could move into a tidy well-ordered district, well away from all those poor people, the ne’er-do-wells – which apparently does seem to be most people’s primary goal in life.
When the local folk: dump their rubbish onto the pavement; fill the gutters with empty beer cans, cigarette ends, and the odd needle; put their rubbish in the wrong coloured bins so that the council refuse to take them, and they sit there stinking for weeks on end; open their windows wide so that their infantile thudding music fills the street; dry their washing on top of their waste bins and hang it over their rusty front railings; scream and do a bit of effing and blinding and door slamming at each other in the evenings and early hours; repeatedly bounce their cars and motorcycles over the speed bumps; have ambulances, police cars and vans flashing their blue lights outside their homes at all hours; have their stocky wide-headed dogs barking and fighting in the middle of the road; move large items of furniture and TVs around using stolen supermarket trolleys; conduct private and intimate, but shouted, conversations with each other over several yards without any sign of embarrassment; sit out on their rubbish bins smoking joints thinking that they look really cool; attract thudding night-time police helicopters to the area – I try to rationalise all this and cheer myself up by imagining that I’m an artist (well, I am that) a poet, a novelist, musician, perhaps a bit of a beatnik, perhaps living in a converted factory loft, in a run-down scruffy Bohemian part of New York, or somewhere similar (actually I don’t think there is anywhere similar to New York.)
Oh, look! There goes Lou Reed, see, he’s with Andy Warhol, Edward Albee, Edgar Allan Poe, Robert De Nero, Debbie Harry…
‘Hey!… Hello Lou!’
‘Oh, hi Dave! How’s it going?…’

About Dave Whatt

Grumpy old surrealist artist, musician, postcard maker, bluesman, theatre set designer, and debonair man-about-town. My favourite tools are the plectrum and the pencil...
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2 Responses to So Dave, do you live in an appropriate environment?…

  1. Dana Doran says:

    It does appear that you have described living in New York!

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