Monthly Archives: December 2013

Overheard and misheard snatches of cafe conversation…

Posted on December 31, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s expletive is ‘Ginger blue bird!…’ – A puzzling oath… For some reason the colour blue has always been popular in oaths, especially with the French – Sacrebleu, Morbleu, where ‘bleu’ may be a replacement for … Continue reading →

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From the ‘Journal of the Hull Surrealist League’…

Posted on December 30, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s random dictionary words are: eidograph, pyx, lebbek, drepanium, and pavis. You must have these words defined and placed in suitable sentences ready for Professor Mouldie first thing in the morning or there will be trouble. … Continue reading →

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Poirot of Navarone…

Posted on December 29, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first…Dulltown, Europe: Today’s instruction, if anyone calls round, is to answer the door flapping your arms like a bird and repeatedly shouting the word ‘feathers’…>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Not much on the TV in this limbo period between Christmas and New Year … Continue reading →

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The diaper slip up…

Posted on December 28, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s weather is composed of glass cubes of grey fluff, with fine gentleness dampening the dirty grass. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> I had a walk down the more industrial side of the river which runs through Dulltown the other … Continue reading →

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The tale of the ancient librarian…

Posted on December 27, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s outside temperature is 280 degrees Kevin. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> ‘Excuse me…’ ‘Yes?’ ‘Could you tell me the way to the library?’ ‘To the what?…’ ‘The library – according to my street map, it should be around here … Continue reading →

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Bowing before the great beast…

Posted on December 26, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s expletive is ‘swelp me cat!’ – In the 17th and 18th centuries ‘cat’ was often used as a euphemism for ‘God’. ‘Swelp me’ is of course a shortening of ‘so help me…’ >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> I think … Continue reading →

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Some titchy, but pithy items…

Posted on December 25, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s sound is that of reindeer hooves clumping about on the roof tiles. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Excuses for being late. No. 192. I’m sorry I’m late, but my stupid hedge trimmer cut through its own cable. An item … Continue reading →

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So, what are those TV ads trying to tell us?…

Posted on December 23, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s architectural term is ‘clasping buttress’ – A buttress which encases the angle of the walls. I once had a clasping buttress, but it soon cleared up after a short course of treatment. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Trouble sleeping? … Continue reading →

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‘The Pink Wall of Tat’ – revisited…

Posted on December 22, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first.,.. Dulltown, Europe: Today’s joke is the one about David Cameron, the traffic warden, and the stuffed mongoose. Oh, how we chuckled in the echoing corridors of power!… (D.C.) >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Yes, dear reader, I think that ‘The Pink Wall … Continue reading →

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Overheard and misheard snatches of cafe conversation…

Posted on December 21, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s featured galaxy is the Small Magellanic Cloud. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> ‘Wainy-cot whey.’ ‘Captured a pair of them.’ ‘Wow, a floor in a corridor!’ ‘A full head of hair?’ ‘Come on, do it!’ ‘So, I just put up … Continue reading →

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Serendipitous blue and orange…

Posted on December 20, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s marmoset is the one sitting doing the Times crossword on the early morning London train. (M) >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Here’s a picture I took back in September this year. Or… Here’s a photograph I took back in … Continue reading →

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…Mood Doom…

Posted on December 19, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s random dictionary words are: hierurgy, pleiomerous, wanthriven, lituus, and equiponderate. It is essential that you have these words placed in proper sentences ready for your meeting with Professor Mouldie first thing in the morning – … Continue reading →

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Jumping fish and sky windows…

Posted on December 18, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s pig is as happy as a human in muck… >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Here is another of my untitled lino prints (about 7″ x 5″ on white A4 drawing paper) from last year. Hm… it looks a bit … Continue reading →

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The festive season…

Posted on December 17, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s financial forecast is for corporate worms to burrow into the soft underbelly of the fiscal platform desperately searching for ragged-trousered philanthropists. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> ‘Mummy…’ ‘Yes Dear?’ ‘Christmas…’ ‘Yes, what about it?’ ‘Well… is it to celebrate … Continue reading →

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Some more mundane domestic matters…

Posted on December 16, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s instruction is to run your fingers around the edges until you locate the nodule; then give it one or two quick nips to get it started. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> About a week ago we had gales. I … Continue reading →

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Small, but pithy items…

Posted on December 15, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s expletive is ‘A bots on you!’ – Said by the Vicar of Wakefield in Oliver Goldsmith’s novel. Apparently bots are nasty parasitical worms found in horses’ stomachs… Sorry dear reader, but that’s the 18th century … Continue reading →

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Mind rambling with science…

Posted on December 14, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s outside temperature is 283 degrees Kevin. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> I used to read science fiction stories. I liked the ones with science in them, but which were surprising, strange and thought-provoking; and I liked the ones which … Continue reading →

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Elegance in yellow on a red ground…

Posted on December 13, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s dance is the Cha-cha-cha – a dance of Cuban origin, with syncopation of the fourth beat. Come on Stella! Let’s Cha-cha-cha round the kitchen – Look out! – you nearly knocked my aspidistra over, you … Continue reading →

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Some overheard and misheard snatches of cafe conversation…

Posted on December 12, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s eel is the non-wiggly one. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> ‘A different otter?’ ‘The other side of the legs.’ ‘A significant passing…’ ‘Like a poisonous bomb in my room.’ ‘I was kidding – a leaf infection.’ ‘A hundred-and-fifty Kevins.’ … Continue reading →

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Pronunciation in rough seas…

Posted on December 11, 2013 by Dave Whatt

But first… Dulltown, Europe: Today’s joke is the one about the Tory politician and the two pelicans in the steam bath. Oh, how we guffawed behind our thick fluffy towels!… >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> You may recall dear reader, that I recently subjected … Continue reading →

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